Still waiting.

It takes commitment to stay patient. I won't know for another 12 months if I'm totally free of any diseases such as HIV/AIDS, Hepatitis, etc. Not knowing leaves me constantly on a slight edge, but the Lord says that with patience comes endurance.

He will help me endure.

prevention.

So on day three of preventative measures against HIV/AIDS. It sucks. I've never been on meds heavier than penicillin so eleven pills a day is starting to have a big effect on me ... it's draining to say the least. But it's prevention. If there was no such thing as prevention, can you imagine how much different life would be?? We as human love having control over things, making sure our plans, our hopes, our dreams, and everything we don't want in life is controlled. Without prevention, there would be such a lack of control. There would be no such thing as medicine, no such thing as vaccines. No such thing as hurricane proof glass, pressure treated lumber, anti-virus software. 

Thank God for prevention.

To him be the glory.

In an instant.

In an instant, life changes. One minute I'm a happy healthy 18 year old, the next minute I could be headed down a path of destructive diseases such as HIV/AIDS or hepatitis due to picking up a piece of plastic off the floor which ended up being a needle. So God really slowed me down, saying "hey look who's in control"? He is. I can't be. He will always have more control than me, even though at times it's so easy to forget.

So as this year progresses, I'll be waiting on the Lord. I start a month of heavy drugs today, and a definite year of abstinence. I've known all my life I've wanted to stay pure till marriage, but this is the cherry on top. Even having a chance of giving someone something that I have a chance of having, I would never rest well. So abstinence it is.

I will wait on you, Lord.

Here.

God is here.

Not just here, but within us.

Hard to believe.

Believe it.

It gives me joy.

Woohoo!

I am content

I am overjoyed

I am happy

I am enjoying every moment of it :)

So I'm kinda ticked.

I'm one of those people that gets ticked when people don't see the obvious.

God is not just an experience that happens every once and a while.

God is here. Everywhere. Omnipresent.

And he just doesn't show up when you feel like it.

God is there all the time. So when you have the mindset going into events like a retreat or a camp thinking "God's going to do marvelous things for me", but you only think these things because of a camp?? Come on. God can do miraculous things for you anywhere, anytime, anyplace. It's sad seeing people that treat God as simply an emotion, rather than what he really is ... our Father. That's why people get emotionally "high" leaving these functions and a few weeks later they're back in their old ways of complacency. 

God is not a feeling. Nor an emotion. 

He is our creator, our master, our healer, the one who brought us life. Treating him as a mere emotion tears me to shreds. He's our Father ... our all knowing Father. Run, but you can't hide.

God is love.